Tired Az (Kiwi English for Really Really Tired)

Today was one of those days...rainy rainy day and I had three blocks of 4 hours sleep (which sounds like it should be enough but for some reason it wasn't) and little energy to leave the house. And though I finished lecturing for Questions of Race and Racism, I still have to go into the office and hold office hours before the final exam tomorrow.

I figured out away to get out of the housen with Charlize, grabbed the Link bus to Auckland University, dropped munchkin off at Kindie (daycare right behind my office) and made my way to HSB 8th floor.

I made myself a cuppa (english breakfast with trim milk...hey, when in rome...) and settled in my office to grade 4 very late student essays. Because, I had little motivation, it took me twice as long to get through the first 3 essays. I was about to leave the last one for tomorrow and pushed myself to read on.

I found the last essay quite fustrating to read. It was well written and full of details about Ethnic Conflict, specifically Rwanda and Burundi (which reminded me of a course I took at Cornell my sophomore year) but I kept trying to figure out when the student was going to tie the topic in with the stuff on race and racism that they learned in class. Up and down the margins, I made notes on how they could have linked the examples to colonialsm, scientific racism, whiteness, genocide...etc. At the end of the essay, I wrote a paragraph long rant telling the student that they needed to "answer" the question and not just pick an interesting topic.

I didn't give the student a grade because I couldn't figure out if I should fail them because they didn't answer the essay questions or if I should pass them (barely) because they wrote a mildly interesting paper with some good arguments.

Arghh, I put the paper a side and went to the bathroom. On my return, I decided I was going to email the student and see if they could explain to me why they choice the topic since they didn't even utter the word race in the whole essay.

I searched for the student's email and couldn't find it. I spent 15 minutes searching and even considered emailing the Department Chair regarding the matter. I could'nt understand why I couldn't find the student in my roster...It must be a glich in the system, I thought.

Finally, I took a look at the cover page and saw "ANTH 100" typed in small black font. The course I taught was "ANTH 105." The student wasn't in my class at all.

I felt bad that I murdered thier essay with all my comments and notes but I was so tired by the whole ordeal that I just wrote "sorry, thought this was one of my student's essays" and slipped it into the correct box. I probably should have used white-out but I didn't have any in my office (other then admin, who uses white-out anymore...lol) and I was sure kiwis called it something different which would require me to explain to the admin what I was looking for (like the time I asked if the cafe did take-out and they stared at me blankly for a few minutes till I realized that I should have said "take away." The words are soo similar but they acted like I spoke a different language)...too much energy.

Wonder what they student is going to think of my comments...lol.

Stars to the past

Last week, Clinton and I landed in Queenstown and drove 3 hours to Te Anau. At about 6pm, the sun had completely set and the road was completely dark, save our car lights. As we drove, Clinton and I kept trying to peer through our windows to catch a glimpse of the stars that seemed to be glittering above us...quite a difficult task when you don't have a sunroof and the car is still moving. The crescent moon hung in the sky tempting my imagination with images of jersey cows jumping it.

We finally decided to pull over somewhere after Kingston and before Garston ( a town with less then 110 people, shut off the car lights and jumped out to stare at the sky.

Imagine the pictures of the milky way in our third grade textbooks and that's what we saw. Magical. There were big ones, small ones, dull ones, bright ones, twinkly ones and fiery ones...a dark blue blanket with gorgeous swarovski crystals.

Clinton and I have only seen stars like this one other time in NZ. It was in Waiheke on New Years Day while camping with our friends on Shephard's Point. We love growing up in NYC and really wouldn't trade it in for anything else, but being able to see stars like this on the other side of the world really gives us a sense of connectedness with the earth, the sky and the history of people who looked up at them in the past.

It's not a coincidence that we were so mesmerized by the sky last week. It was Matariki, Maori New Year which is marked by the visibility of a particular set of stars (constellation Taurus) in the end of May till July.

Though we didn't know much about the meaning of Matariki, the energy of the sky seemed to compel us to acknowledge our blessings.

On our return home, I did a little research on Matariki (which is still occuring) and found this:

Heralded by the rising of the star constellation known as Matariki, the Māori New Year signalled a time for connecting with, and giving thanks to the land, sea and sky. It was a time for the community to come together to farewell those departed and acknowledge the year gone by. It was also a time to turn to the future, welcoming the new generation to the world and planning for the year ahead.

In addition Matariki was a time when people would gather to share kai, rituals, entertainment, hospitality and learnings.

While the pre-dawn rising of the star cluster Matariki is referred to as 'Te Tau Hou', the New Year, for many Māori the first new moon after the rise of Matariki signalled the start of the New Year celebrations, with the moon (Marama) being central to activities of harvesting kai and the start for all things new.

Historically, the star cluster was a navigational aid for Māori and an indicator of the upcoming seasons. If the stars were clear, it was a sign that the year ahead would be warm and therefore productive. If they were hazy and closely bunched together, then a cold year would be in store.

Matariki celeberations were popular before the arrival of the Europeans in New Zealand and they continued into the 1900s. Gradually they dwindled, with one of the last traditional festivals recorded in the 1940s.

At the beginning of the 21st century Matariki celebrations were revived and have become a special time of the year to respect the land we live on, celebrate the unique place we live in and continue to share and grow with each other.

I love the idea of respect, celebration, life, communion and growth...may you find all these aspects in your life, abundantly.

32 years of living

It's been quite some time since I blogged. I've thought about it and even mentally archived some blog topics but have pushed other things up on the priority list.

So since, I last blogged there's been quite of few things going on in my life (all of which I will mention in my upcoming blogs):

*Best Friend's Wedding in Puerto Rico (while I was 7 and half months prego)
*Finished teaching fellowship at Waikato University
*Waited 2 weeks for the delivery of my first child on November 26th, 2010 4:11am
*My mother, who is scared of heights and is claustrophobic, traveled 22 hours to visit us and her new granddaughter.
*Camped for the first time, New Year's Day with Boopsie & her Family
*Marcy, close university friend and sorority sister, came to the South Pacific (my first girl's trip as a mom)
*Started Teaching Fellowship at Auckland University
*Charlize has turned 6 months (she communicated through coos and interesting sounds, she sits & rolls and loves hearing people sing)
*Visited South Island (Nelson, Blenheim, Milford Sound, Te Anau, Queenstown)
*Skydived 12,000 feet

It's been a really busy few months. But it's great ones.

So today, I turn 32 years old (NYC time) and I thought I would begin to blog again...not only to share my experiences but also as a way to process the world around me and establish myself as a writer (someone who writes everyday).

I'm not going to say too much today in this entry...but just want to take the time to snapshot my life at this moment:

I'm sitting in a beautiful hotel room overlooking the Remarkable Mountain Ranges and lake on a brisk blue-sky day in Queenstown, with my beautiful daughter (still wearing the poka dot onesie and pink dress from last night's birthday dinner @ Amisfield...hey she fell asleep and I wasn't going to wake her to put PJs...)fussing as Clinton rolls her around the bed.

I feel grateful and blessed to have so much love in my life. Even from a far I feel the warmth from all the relationships in my life (birthday "petal" cupcakes, cards, facebook posts, emails, phone calls, texts and even a skype session with my mom who had a cake with a candle for me).

Thirty-one was "epic" (as labeled by Clinton), and Thirty-two I'll coast.